I know that you are busy. Maybe you even have a job. That's one reason I spend countless hours hunched over my computer screen--researching this years ballot measures. For you. My busy busy reader.
So just grab a #2 pencil and your California ballot and here goes (apologies to those of you who don't live in California):
1A: The Train. No. Why no? It's a bond measure. Our state budget is screwed. Otherwise I'd vote yes.
2: Let's Stop Tormenting The Farm Animals Act. Yes. Unless you are some sort of heartless Nazi sonofabitch.
3. Children's Hospital. No. Bond measure. Sorry.
4. Endanger Pregnant Teens Act. No. Wait, not no, HELL NO!
5. Let The Potheads Out of Prison Act. Yes. About frickin' time too. Important step away from the US becoming a police state.
6. Let's Become More of a Police State Act. No. Let's not.
7. Renewable Energy Confusion Initiative. I'm voting no, but I'm not 100% sure, so make up your own mind on this one. Seems like important environmental groups are opposed, but those same groups may be taking funding from PG&E. I'm going with 'when in doubt, don't'.
8. God Hates Fags Constitutional Amendment. No. Let's keep their church out of our state.
9. The Other Police State Amendment. No. Ooooh, let's all be scared. Charlie Manson--Ooooh.
10. The T Boone Pickins Enrichment Act. No. We really don't need lots more natural gas cars. We need electric cars, and plug in hybrids. T Boone has enough money.
11. Redistricting for Dummies. Yes. I'm trusting Common Cause and The League of Women Voters on this one. The opponents make it sound so scary. But a 99% re-election rate is scarier still.
12. Veteran's Bond Act. No. It's a bond. Sorry guys. Once Obama starts the nationwide conversion to green energy independence and there's full employment and huge tax revenues we'll be ready to send some cash your way.
Measure Q. Yes. Even if I thought you should vote no, I wouldn't say so. My friend Meredith would tear my head off. But really, it's yes yes yes, since it's a sales tax funded measure, rather than a bond measure. We need a train. Now. Please.
Anyway, if you think I'm totally wrong on any of these, please leave a comment or two.